


Noah Porter Barba

by Barson4Ever



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Adoption, F/M, Family Fluff, Fluff and Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2020-04-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:55:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 8,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21607912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Barson4Ever/pseuds/Barson4Ever
Summary: Noah's storyline slightly AU
Relationships: Rafael Barba/Olivia Benson
Comments: 2
Kudos: 33





	1. Wednesday's Child

The search for Nicky Moore was stressful, getting Alexa to tell Olivia, Rollins, Fin, and Amaro where Nicky was. One of the three girls they had kidnapped said not to go in the other room, said he was sleeping. Amanda took point going in, and Liv followed. They saw a little baby boy in a chest drawer; they called ACS, and they went to find Roger and Nicky one girl saying Roger took Nicky with him. 

**"Baby boy doe was found in the custody of two known criminals who also had possession of four other children at the time."** Olivia explained to Judge Linden.

**"And what happened to those other children?"**

**"Nicky Moore has been reunited with his adoptive parents, and three rescued girls, are in the foster care system awaiting permanent placement."** said Pippa Cox.

 **"And despite the extensive news coverage, no one has come forward to claim Baby Boy Doe, who was also found in the motel room?"** Judge Linden asked.

 **"No, your honor we've checked hospitals' records, and databases for all reports on missing children, and no matches have been found."** Olivia explained. 

**"That's why we're making this motion today your honor."** Pippa said.

 **"Understood, it seems tragic that at a time when so many people yearn to have a child, a perfectly healthy and beautiful infant like this goes unclaimed. This baby being declared a destitute child will remain in the custody of children's services until efforts to find a parental caretaker are exhausted and more permanent arrangements can be made."** Judge Linden said. 

Olivia wasn’t listening she had zoned out, listening to the clock in her ticking away. After court was over she went straight home and took a nice long bath with bubbles, she was still there when Rafael got home. 

“Olivia?”

“Hmm?”

“What are you doing?” Raf asked smirking.

“Nothing relaxing want to join me?” 

Raf felt of the water and drained it, refilling it with more warm water and more bubble bath. Olivia flinched a little when he got in, wrapping his arms around her.

“It’s just me Liv, not him.” He whispered.

“I know, sorry.”

Raf kissed her head.

“You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“I know, Rafa?”

“Yeah?”

“Have you thought about us and kids?” 

Raf smiled against her.

“Is this about that baby?”

“Yeah.”

“I would be nervous but if you help me, I’ll try to do my best.”

Olivia smiled listening to him talking about them and kids.


	2. Downloaded Child

"Did you go to family court again?" Raf said 

"Yeah, Baby Boy Doe went back to ACS facility I talked to the counselor on the case, not very helpful, we just got a case." Liv sighed.

"Okay. Text me when you need me." 

After Rafael told them to try to jog Jenny's memory, they got Jenny to realize she was Lacy, and then the civil suits came. Amanda and Olivia also told Jenny that the videos were on the internet. 

**Later that night.**

"You ever heard anything about the Baby Boy Doe?" Raf asked, as they got in bed.

"No, they’re having another hearing tomorrow." 

"You going?" Raf asked knowing she would.

"Yes, if we don't catch a case." 

Raf nodded, and smiled at her.

"What?"

"I love you." He kissed her goodnight.

"Love you, too Raf."


	3. Spring Awakening

**"Excuse me, Pippa?”'**

**"Oh, Sergeant are you going to yell at me too?"**

**"No um actually, I was gonna ask you if I could visit the baby.”**

**"It's fine by me. You remember Chantal from social services?”** Pippa asked.

Olivia was walking out, getting the text from Declan and Rollins saying Nick was in holding. Raf had also texted her.

How did it go?-Raf

Good, Pippa and Chantal set up a visit so I can see him.-Liv

Want me to go?-Raf 

If you want-Liv

I'll go if you want me to and depends on how work will be.-Raf

**“And Sergeant Benson, you're here again?"**

**"Yes, your Honor."**

**“As the birth mother is deceased, and no father or other relatives have come forward. I officially declare Noah Porter an orphan and ward of the state of New York. He shall continue to be cared for in an ACS facility unless... Sergeant Benson, you rescued the infant, isn't that right?”**

**"Yes, your honor.”**

**"And you're the only one who's taken a consistent interest on his behalf. Is there any chance you might like you become a foster mother to this baby?"**

**"I'm sorry excuse me, your honor?”** Liv couldn't believe she had suggested it.

**“I have a feeling about this, Sergeant Benson call it a judge's hunch. If you agree, I will order Noah Porter into your care as custodial parent for one year, at which time you will be given the option to permanently adopt him. Do you agree?”**

Rafael was waiting on Liv outside the courtroom, just having gotten out of court himself, meeting her for dinner. He heard her asking Liv as he walked in,

"Who are you?" Linden had asked.

"SVU's ADA and Olivia's boyfriend."

Raf looked at Liv and the look she gave him was begging him to let her, let them help Noah he smiled, squeezing her hand.

"You sure you want to?"

"Yes." she replied.

“Could we both be custodial parents for one year, and then given the option to permanently adopt him?”

“Are you two married and living together?”

“Just living together.” Liv smiled. 

“That’s not a problem, considering how much Olivia has been in this courtroom the last few months. I’m granting the two of you custody of Noah Porter.” 

Raf and Liv smiled at each other, going to child services. Chantal brought Noah out, handing him to Liv. 

“Good luck, you two.”

On their way home, they stop at a baby story to get some of Noah’s needs. When they got home Raf said,

“Where is he sleeping tonight? The crib won’t be here until tomorrow.”

“He can sleep in between us or on one of our chest.” Liv whispered. 

That night as they laid down, Noah on Raf’s chest, Liv’s hand on Noah’s back Raf felt at home for the first time.


	4. Girls Disappeared

**"Lucy. Hey, I'm coming home right now. Do Not let anybody in okay?"** Liv said.

**"Oh, we're not home."**

**"What? Where?"** Liv was getting worried.

**"We're at the park. He's been cooped up inside all day so I thought we’d get some fresh air....."**

GUNSHOTS

**"Lucy's what's going on?"**

Liv ran out, not hearing anything she hung up, called back up, then Raf.

"Hey, mi Amor."

"Noah. Park. Gunshots."

"The same one we always go to?"

"Yes."

"Meet you there."

As Liv got to the park, other officers were there.

**"Hey SVU. SVU, my son was in the park."**

**"You might wanna check with EMS."** one officer said.

Seeing Noah's stroller, Liv panicked.

**"Oh my God."**

She heard Rafa.

"Noah! Olivia!"

She looked back, relieved.

"Rafa." She hugged him.

"Mi Amor." He whispered, hugging her.

He saw Noah's stroller too.

"Mijo?"

"I don't know. Lucy! Lucy!" Liv yelled, running Raf followed.

Lucy stepped out behind an ambulance.

**"Liv."**

**"Is he okay?"**

**"We're fine, we're fine."**

Raf let out a breath of relief.

**"It's okay, it's okay, it's okay."**

Raf walked behind her, kissed her hair. She turned toward him handing Noah to him.

"Mijo." Raf whispered as Noah snuggled closer.

**Later**

**"Hi Noah, how's my boy? Huh, how's my baby? I got some good news, sweetheart. The man that hurt your Mama is never ever gonna hurt anybody again. It's over, it's okay I love you."**

Raf walked out of the bathroom he been in there getting ready for bed, he opened the door. When he heard Olivia talking to Noah, after a minute it was quiet Raf walked into the living room, thinking about getting a bigger place maybe, he doubted it. He saw the woman and toddler who had become his world, he walked closer.

"Let's get him and you both in bed."

She nodded, letting Raf take over bedtime duty while she went to take a shower. After Liv was in bed and and Noah was down for the night, they both laid in each other's arms. Both falling asleep with smiles on their faces.


	5. Producer's Backend

**"Nick, can you say uncle Nick?"** Nick asked Noah holding him up in the air.

**"Hey, he likes you he doesn't just spit up on anyone. Well, actually lately he does."**

He hands Liv Noah back, Lucy takes Noah back for a bath. 

**"Put your suit on, your back in."** Liv said smiling. 

Nick smiles at her,

**"So talk to the boy talk to the father, and get their side."**

**"Thank you, Olivia."**

**"Your welcome, hey take Carisi with you."**

**"Really? I hear he's a real empath."** Nick said.

**"Oh, where you hear that hmm? Hey, he's eager to learn and I think working with you is only going to make him better."**

"Like it has Barba?" Nick asked as he headed at the door.

Liv smiled at Nick as he looked back at her before he left.

After Nick left, Raf called,

"How's mi amor and mijo?" 

"We're okay, Lucy's giving Noah a bath, Nick just left IAB cleared him. He's back." 

"That's good. Tell Noah I'll be home soon." 

**"Could you just hand me my bag, please thank you. Amaro, I need you to hold down the fort for a second." Liv said as she came out of her office.**

**"Is everything all right?"** Nick asked.

 **"I don't know, Noah's in the ER."** Liv said walking out calling Raf.

"Mi amor, I'm on my way Lucy texted me." Raf said.

"Okay, I am just leaving the precinct."

"I'm walking in was on my way home, when she called." 

"Okay, be there soon. Will you text me when you see him?"

"You know I will." 

"Bye Rafa, I love you."

"Bye Liv, love you too."


	6. Holden's Manifesto

**"Liv?"**

**"Hey."**

**"How's Noah?"**

**"He's finally fell asleep, his fever down."**

**"Detective Amaro called my cell. I told him you were still here, but your phones off. Said it was urgent."** Lucy said.

**"Yeah."**

**"I'll stay with him."** Lucy said, looking at Noah.

**"Okay, you wait with Noah till I come back?"**

**"Yes. Yeah of course."** Lucy said.

**"Okay. All right thanks, Lucy.”**

Olivia looked at her phone texting, Rafael.

Caught a case, had to leave Noah. Will you come stay with him? and give Lucy a break?-Liv

On my way, tell Lucy.-Raf

"Hey Lucy, Rafa is on his way, you can take a break when he get's here."

"Thanks, Liv go."

While Fin and Amanda were at the hospital with Haley, Rafael texted Olivia an update on Noah.

Noah's stable, sleeping okay. How's the case?- Raf

Okay, I'll hopefully be there soon.-Liv

**Later**

Olivia went back to the hospital, Raf staying in with Noah while Liv talked to Noah's doctor.

 **"Dr. Lee, Noah looks so much better his colors come back he's smiling. Thank you."** Liv said.

 **"He's stabilized, for now, he's breathing on his own."** Dr. Lee said

**"Great, when do I take him home?"**

**"We'd like to keep him a few more days."**

**"Why?"** Liv asked, confused.

**"Noah's birth mother was a drug addict?"**

**"Yes. He hasn't had much prenatal or infant care, but we are all caught up. He's had his vaccinations, his weight."** Liv said.

**"You brought him into your home four months ago? Before that multiple foster care homes?"**

**"Yes, but since then he's been thriving."** Liv said.

**"Not to alarm you, but his lung x-ray showed old rib fractures, it's not uncommon in foster care infants, were the homes vetted?"**

**"Yes. But the first 2 1/2 years of his life, he was not in a stable environment, but child services said that there were no signs of abuse.”**

**"How hard did you look? We need to do a more thorough workup."** Dr. Lee said.

 **"What does that mean? He had so many needles."** Liv said.

**"No needles, skeletal x-ray, CT scan.”**

**"But he's developing normally."**

**"He has lung issues. He had it rough early on, sometimes complications from trauma develop later, physiologically and neurologically. He can't tell us what he went through I'd like to be proactive here.”** Dr. Lee said.

She walked off, Olivia in shock as she walked back to Noah's room. Raf had talked to her and came down, he was sitting beside Noah's crib.

"What did Dr. Lee say?"

Olivia looked at Noah.

"Abuse from other foster homes, old rib fractures abuse. They are going to do x-ray's, CT scan."

"Mijo." Rafael looked at Noah, then at Liv as she got a call from Amaro.

Mrs. Jackson called.- Liv

Yeah, she said she would, I was fixing to text you sorry.- Raf

It's okay, got to go, suspect at his old school. Text me an update.-Liv

Okay. I've got Noah- Raf

Thank you, love you.- Liv

Love you, too.- Raf

**"You gave Mami a scare, didn't you Noah? But you're my big boy. You're my little fighter, aren't you? You're so strong. You had to be, huh? You got a long life ahead of you. You got places to see, things to do, and people who will love you."**

Olivia looked over at the doorway seeing Raf,

"Like I do, mijo." Raf whispered, walking closer, taking Noah into his arms.

"How's mijo?" Raf asked,

"Good, get to go home soon." Liv said.

Rafael smiled and blew raspberries on Noah's stomach, making him laugh and try to wiggle out of Rafa's arms. Raf chuckled and looked over at Liv smiling.

"Mi Familia." He whispered.


	7. Pornstar Requiem

**"I can't sell this to a jury."** Raf said. 

**“Are you backing off of this because of the heat you're getting from the Mayor's office over Hudson?"**

**"You know me better than that."** Raf said leaning forward.

 **"I thought I did."** Liv leaned on his desk across from him. 

**"Rollins find out if both families are splitting the bill."** Liv said.

Amanda left to check it out, Liv looked at Raf.

“Sorry.”

“Don’t, you just want these boys put away, I do too.” Raf said.

Liv nodded and left.

After the verdict, Raf went home while Liv, Fin, Rollins, and Carisi went back to the precinct. Evie’s mother came, saying Evie's gone, Amanda and Sonny her in New Hampshire after talking to her Amanda and Sonny headed back calling Liv, telling her what had happened. Olivia hung up and walked into the apartment, seeing Raf with Noah playing on the floor.

“Hey, Liv.”

"Hi Rafa." she said beside him, giving him a kiss.

“They find her?”

“Yeah, in New Hampshire.”

“Sorry, I tried.” he whispered, kissing her.

Liv looked at him,

“I know and Noah’s never going to Hudson.” Liv smiled looking at Noah.

Noah smiled giving her a hug and a sloppy kiss.

“I hope not, Mijo is going to Harvard, aren’t you Noah?” Raf said picking him up.

Noah giggled.

After story and bedtime, they laid in bed.

"Sorry what I said before about the Mayor's office." Liv whispered her head on his chest.

"I know, you were just stress."

He kissed her, and closed his eyes,

"I am sorry."

"I know, I forgive you, I love you. Goodnight."

Olivia chuckled kissed his chest and fell asleep.


	8. Pattern Seventeen

Hey, Trevor just texted me, you have to go to court about Noah’s hospital stay?-Raf

Yeah, they weren’t happy about me working the case while he was in there.-Liv

**After the hearing**

How did it go?-Raf

It was okay, work not good be glad you took off-Liv

Raf frowned. He looked at Noah.

“Hijo, you miss Mami?” 

Noah smiled. Raf picked him up and spent the rest of the day playing and trying to get Noah to speak more and play with him. After dinner and bath time was done, he went to their room he read to Noah, sang a couple of songs to him, they fell asleep listening to some cartoon Noah liked. Olivia got home later that night not seeing or hearing Noah or Rafael. She walked to Noah’s room, not seeing Noah in his crib. She walked into her and Raf’s room, cartoons were on and both her boys asleep. Olivia changed and slid in beside Raf and cuddled up beside him. 

“Welcome home, Mi Amor.” Raf whispered.

“Hi, goodnight, love you.” Liv whispered already half asleep.

Raf chuckled,

“Night Mi Amor, love you too.”


	9. Agent Provocateur

Need a warrant, got the video footage from the hotel-Liv

Should have an email by the time you get there-Raf

**“Guess who didn’t show? I just spent the past two hours with 23 grand jurors playing Sudoku.”**

**“It’s Friday how about we pick him up at the end of the day?”**

**“So he can’t get processed until Monday, and has to spend the weekend at the tombs? Motherhood has really changed you Liv, brought out your sweet side. Do it.”**

**“Thank you.”**

**“Check please.” **Raf said as he stepped off the court house steps.****

“Rafa!”

“Yes, Liv?” he turned around and smiled.

“Home or office?”

“Office just to sign a few things, then home. It shouldn’t be long.” He kissed her.

Raf went back to his office, finished up paperwork. He went home, as soon as he closed the door, he felt something collide with his leg. He looked down and smiled as two chubby hands tug on his pants leg.

“Hola hijo, Te divertiste hoy?” (Hi son, did you have fun today?)

Noah giggled.

Raf lifted Noah.

“Where’s Mami?”

“In here Rafa.”

He walked into the kitchen, Noah on his hip.

“Lucy started dinner, I’m finishing it.” Liv said.

“Okay, I’m going to go change. Noah, you want to stay with Mami or me?”

“Papi!”

Raf took Noah and changed, then both laid on the bed. Liv yelled that dinner was done so they ate. Liv was showering while they played with a toy, Noah tried to stand but fell,

“Hijo, you okay?”

Noah shook his head no and started crying.

“Shh, I’m sorry I should have helped you, buddy.” Raf whispered.

Noah cuddled into him, Raf felt his head, he didn’t feel anything.

“You want Mami?”

“No." Noah whispered.

“I’m sorry." Raf whispered.

“Okay, Papi.” Noah looked up, grabbed his shirtsleeve.

Raf lean down, Noah kissed his cheek.

The boy’s getting better at speaking every day. Raf kissed his forehead.

“Te amo, mijo."

“Love Papi.”

Liv came out of their bathroom, Raf was watching Noah as he watched TV.

“Hey.”

Raf looked up at her then back at Noah, feeling his head.

“What’s wrong?” Liv asked getting in beside Raf.

“We were playing, he fell and hit his head on the toy.” Raf pointed to it.

“You okay, sweet boy?”

Noah looked at his Mami and nodded.

“Papi made it better.”

Liv smiled at Raf.

“I’m sorry mijo, Liv.” Raf kissed Noah’s head.

“It’s okay, if a bump comes up by morning, we’ll go see the doctor.”

“I’m sorry Liv.”

“Rafa it’s okay, he’s a growing boy. He’s going to have bumps, bruises from where he fell. No one is perfect.” Liv said.

“You are mi Amor.”

“Love you both.” Liv kissed them both.

“Love you, Liv.”

“Love you, Mami!”


	10. Padre Sandunguero

Raf called Olivia 

“Hey, how was your day?” Raf asked. 

“Not good, caught a case, Nick’s dad is involved.” Liv said. 

“Need me to come down tomorrow?” 

“Depends on the evidence.” 

**“Make it a double.”**

**“Tough day?”**

**“It’s a he said she won’t say no one else saw what happened and the jury senses all my witnesses have a grudge against your father. Thank you.”** Raf said. 

**“Do they see why?”**

**“I doubt it, he’s sitting at the table, smiling at the judge, flirting with the stenographer, egging his attorney on. He’s got the whole room on his side.”** Raf replied. 

**“Ahh, it’s the story of my life. He beat my mother, and she’d testify for him if he asked.”** Nick said leaning on the bar.

**“I’m gonna see if they’ll take a plea for harassment.”**

**“What a misdemeanor? He fractured her skull.”** Nick said.

**“You and I know that. But even if you testify, he could still walk.”**

**“But what are you telling me?”** Nick asked looking at Raf.

**“You don’t have to do this. I should have never have asked you to testify in open court against your father.”**

**“Are you playing me now?”**

**“No. I know what’s it’s likes to have to face down your old man. Mine’s been dead 15 years and my hand still curls into a fist whenever I think of him.”** Raf said taking a drink of scotch. 

**“So what.. he just gets to walk away again?”**

**“It’s your family, your call.”** Raf said. 

Raf left Nick, going home to Noah and to wait for Liv to come home.

 **Later**

Olivia walked into the apartment.

“I’m home!” she yelled.

“Mami!” Noah yelled and half walked/crawled over to her before he fell and she picked him up.

“You okay, Mami’s sweet boy?”

Noah nodded.

“Papi no play.” Noah whispered.

Liv frowned, Raf always played with Noah no matter how tired he was.

“Let’s go check on him hm? Where is he?”

“Bed.”

Liv walked into the bedroom, letting Noah climb on top of him.

“Papi? Papi?” 

“Mijo?” Raf whispered half asleep opening his eyes looking at him, smiling.

“Mami home.” 

Raf looked at Liv.

“Sorry mi amor, guess I was more tired than I realized.”

“It’s okay, Rafa.”

Liv laid beside him. 

“Mami play?”

Liv nodded and let Noah down, letting him go play in the living room. 

“How’s Nick?” Raf asked.

“Okay, how are you?”

“I don’t know, to be honest.” 

“Nick told me to check on you, something you said about your father.” 

“Let’s just say Nick and I both know what it’s like to be punching bags, our mother’s too.” 

“Rafa…”

Raf lean forward kissed her nose, then her lips, laying his head on his pillow smiling at her.

“It’s okay Liv, I made it through it. Noah’s not ever going to know what it was like for us.”

Liv nodded.

“Love you.”

“Love you too, Liv. Let’s get mijo in bed.”


	11. Undercover Mother

**“What the hell are you doing? You put a gun in my face, then you pistol whip one of our guys?”** Fin asked. 

**“That mouse job’s one of yours?”** Declan asked, upset. 

**“Okay, let’s do the introductions later. You want to tell us what the hell you were doing back there?”** Liv asked.

 **“I should ask you the same thing! Nine months I’m embedding myself in the trafficking ring, and you want to blow it with a super bowl vice bust? That’s the dumbest riskiest day of the year!”** Declan yelled. 

**“Okay, we’re looking for a trafficked girl.”**

**“Just one? I thought I taught you to think big. I’m tracking hundreds. I’m working for Johnny D.”** Declan said pacing. 

**“Johnny D we don’t know him.”** Fin said.

 **“Of course you don’t. That’s what took me nine months to figure out. And now thanks to you I’m gonna have to spend a week at Riker’s until that gun charge is dropped. I have the reins to you."** Declan said. 

**“Okay I missed you to Declan. We’re looking for this girl.”** Liv said.

 **“She alive?** ” Fin asked. 

**“In a sense. She’s damage goods. Your friend Timmer did a number on her before he sold her to Johnny D. 800 bucks is all he got.”**

**“Where does Johnny D keep her?”**

**“He’s just brought the girl from me. He’s never taken me to his lair.”**

**“Buying wow. So now you’re trafficking?”** Liv asked.

 **“I’m earning his trust. And you do not relay that to 1PP.”** Declan said, frustrated. 

**“Then you tell Johnny D that you want to buy Ariel from him.”** Liv told him.

 **“You overplayed your hand. He’s to smart, he’ll smell the trap.”**

**“Listen to me I made a promise to that’s girls mother.”**

****“That’s a promise you’re not gonna be able to keep. It’s to late for Ariel. Those girls are so broken, they won’t save themselves no one’s gonna talk. Johnny D doesn’t think twice about killing some whore or pimp. Even a cop.”** Declan said. **

****Later that night** **

****“Uh, who’s at our door?”** **

**Liv got up to open the door.**

****“Melinda, everything okay?”** **

****“I’m sorry to bother you at home, but I wanted to keep this off the books.”** Melinda said. **

****“Oh okay come on in. Keep what off the books?”** **

****“I need to know the legal status of your relationship to Noah.”** Melinda said as she looked at Liv. **

****“What, why?”** **

****“Just tell me. Have you started the adoption process?”** Melinda sat in front of Liv. **

****“Well, there’s a pile of paperwork. But the second that I’m allowed to adopt him. I will. What’s going on?”** Liv asked. **

****“There was a hit… on Johnny Drake’s DNA when it went through the system. It was a familial match in an unrelated case and not discoverable in Drake’s current case. He never needs to know.”** **

****“Needs to know what? What are you saying?”** Liv asked, shifting Noah.**

****“What I’m trying to tell you… Johnny D is Noah’s father.”** **

After Melinda left, Liv sat there Noah in her arms. Her phone started ringing, seeing it was Raf she answered, 

“Hey, mi amor.”

“Rafa.” She smiled.

“I won’t be home tonight, Mami called and abuela is in the hospital.”  
“Is she okay?”

“Yeah, she fell in her apartment.” 

“You want me to come down?” 

“No you and mijo stay home tell him papi’s sorry he can’t tuck him in.” 

“I will.” She sighed.

“You okay, Liv?” 

“Yeah, I need to tell you something, not over the phone though.” 

“Okay, I’ll be home in the morning.” 

“Love you.”

“Love you, too. Give Noah a hug and kiss for me.” 

“I will, love you.” 

“Bye mi amor.”

“Bye, Rafa.”

Liv got Noah settled, 

“I wish papi would come home Noah.”

Noah smiled at her at the word papi. After he was asleep Liv tried to sleep, not getting much without Raf beside her.


	12. December Solstice

Raf got home the next morning, Liv met him at the door, having forgotten his keys at Lucia’s. 

**"Watch those blocks."**

**"So what that toy box is just uh decorative?"**

**"Oh you brought the jokes. Hey listen will you hold him for a second."**

**"Oh...uh... So um you said you didn't want to talk about this in the office."** Raf held Noah out away from him since he had spent the night at the hospital. 

**"Uh Johnny D the pimp, he's still in custody on federal charges?"**

**"Yes his lawyer tried for bail, but was shut down why?"**

**“What if our investigation turned up information that if Johnny D fathered a child with Ellie Porter?"** Liv looked at him. 

Raf bit his lip and looked at her.

**"This conversation is now hypothetical as of now."**

They both sat on the couch.

**"If Johnny D was in fact Noah’s biological father… is that something that NYPD would have to disclose?”**

**“You double checked?”** Raf asked as he looked at Noah. 

**“Ran the DNA three times. Johnny D was a major trafficker. Probably bought and sold every girl who’s been put to work on New York. And then he raped them to break them in. Look, I haven’t slept since I…. just tell me that he doesn’t have to know.”** Liv pleaded with Raf. 

**“He doesn’t. It’s not exculpatory in anyway. He never needs to finds out.”**

**"I've already started the adoption paperwork."**

**Given Noah's early history, how can you be expected, to know who his father was?"** Raf asked.

Liv just looked at him, then at Noah. Noah started to fuss wanting his Papi. 

“You sure you don’t want to be added to the adoption papers?” Liv asked. 

“Yes, but not right now especially with everything you just told me about Johnny D. You understand?”

“Yeah, a sergeant and DA who haven’t disclosed.” 

Raf nodded, as he took Noah in his arms.

“Lucy will be here in an hour, I’ll be at the office later, I’ll call you if we catch a case.” Olivia said. 

“Okay."

**After the Verdict**

**“One year probation? She killed her husband.”** Carisi said.

 **“Well one might argue that she kept him alive.”** Liv said.

 **“And I do believe that she loved him.”** Barba added.

 **“So what? People can’t love somebody and still hasten their demise?”**

**“Carisi, I know you admire the guy, but there was no way a jury was gonna put Charmaine in jail.”**

**“And the daughters are okay with this?”**

Raf looked at Liv, then back at Sonny.

****“One of them is.”** **

****“Judith?”** **

Raf nodded.

****“Talk to her yourself.”** **

Carisi walked out of Liv’s office.

 **“Families.”** Raf said.

 **“How’s your grandmother?”** Liv asked.

 **“Still giving me grief about moving her out of that walk up death trap she’s somehow confused with Shangrila La.”**

**“She didn’t like the facility?”**

“No she didn’t. But it can’t be her choice anymore. So we’re starting to pack up her things, under protest.”

**“Hmm, that’s hard. You are a good grandson.”**

**“No I’m not. I’m over compensating. What are you gonna be doing when you’re 85?”** Raf asked.

**“Squabbling with you?”**

**“Wouldn’t that be nice?”**

Raf smiled. Liv smiled back, they both went home. They were waiting for Lucy to bring Noah home when Raf got a call from his mother, Liv watched his face crumbled.

“Got to go, abuelita.”

“Want me to go to?” Liv asked getting up with him following him to the door. 

“No, I’ll go, you wait for Lucy and Noah.” Raf moved to the door when Liv stopped him.

“Love you, I’m sorry.” Liv whispered as she kissed him. 

Raf broke the kiss,

“I love you, Liv.”

Raf left, going to the apartment. 

**“Mami?"**

**“Raf.”**

**“I came over to help her go through her things, you know, just to help her go through her stuff. And I buzzed the buzzer and… and there was no answer. So you know I’ve got a key so I came in went up the stairs got into the apartment walked down the hallway and she was laying on her bed.”** Lucia said.

**“I love you, Mami. I’m so sorry.”**

**“I never should have agreed to this. She told us she didn’t want to move. I’ve should’ve moved in with her, I should’ve.. I’ve should’ve quit the job.”**

**“Mami, Mami, no. It was me, okay.”**

**“She said she wanted to die in her own home.”**

**“And she did.”** Raf whispered, with tears in his eyes.

After a while Lucia got Raf to head home to Liv and Noah. He got home, letting himself in. Raf walked into their small living room seeing Liv sitting on the couch. Noah in the floor playing with Eddie. 

“Sweet boy, look.” Liv whispered. 

Noah looked up, smiling, standing and toddled over to Raf. Raf crouched down holding his arms out. When Noah reached out Raf lifted him up, semi-smiling. 

“Hey mijo.”

“Papi.” Noah kissed his cheek. 

Raf kissed the side of his head, as he walked over to Liv on the couch. Once Raf was beside her,

“The toy box is still decorative?” Raf smirked weaky. 

Liv nodded, laying her head on his shoulder. 

“When is the funeral?”

“In a week."

“I’ll go with you if you want me to?” 

Raf nodded, as he cuddled Noah close to him. The three of them sat there for a while, Raf finally getting up and put Noah down for the night. Liv met him in their room, after getting in bed. Liv laid her head on his chest, he kissed her head. Within ten minutes both were away.


	13. Granted Immunity

Liv and the squad were confiscating all the kids phones when Liv got a call,

 **“Excuse me, Dr.Lee, no Noah’s home with the babysitter. Why? Is everything okay?”** Liv asked. 

After Liv had gotten Noah to Dr. Lee’s office 

**“He was exposed to measles? How?”** Liv asked. 

**“Another patient in the waiting room. And Noah may have been exposed. Let’s not panic.”** Dr. Lee said.

**“He was just vaccinated yesterday.”**

**“Which is good, but the vaccine takes time, to go into full effect. No fever so far, so a good sign.”**

**“This patient that he was exposed to was it Aiden Dole? He has an older brother, Gabriel.”**

**“I’m sorry, I can’t say.”**

**“Of course, I understand. So what now? Is there anything I can do preventative? I mean with his respiratory issues?”** Liv asked. 

**“I like you to quarantine him at home. No exposure to other children. Adults who have been vaccinated are fine.”** Dr. Lee said.

**“For how long?”**

**“Eight days to start. I know that with your job it will be difficult.”**

**“We’ll do whatever we have to, right? Come here little man. We’ll do whatever we have to.”**

Leaving the doctor’s Liv texted Raf.

Noah was exposed to measles, you vaccinated?- Liv

Yeah, how did he get exposed?- Raf

Drs office when I brought him to be vaccinated. We need to quarantine him at home.- Liv 

Okay, I’ll bring work home with me and Lucy can watch him while you are at work.- Raf

 **“She’s called our bluff, and the measles misdirect, offense in the hospital.”** Raf said.

 **“Yeah, but she may not be blowing smoke, Noah’s in the hospital.”** Amanda said. 

**“What does that have to do with TriBeCa Academy?”**

**“Well I think he might’ve been infected by the younger sibling of one of the boys of the party.”**

**“Maybe these kids had a vaccination exemption.”**

**“I don’t want to pull a Carisi, but we could be looking at reckless endangerment.”** Amanda suggested. 

**“Find out if we are.”**

**“We can subpoena a blood sample.”** Liv said. 

**“The risks of vaccinations outweigh the benefits. When Gabriel was born, I tried to get a medical or religious exemption, but I couldn’t get either one.”** Trudy said. 

**“So, that’s why you had Dr. Setrakian lied on his records.”**

**“He believes parents should have the right, to decide what’s best for their children.”**

**“Did you recommend him to other families, looking to get around the law?”** Rafael asked. 

**“The law is unjust. As a mother protecting my child, I can’t tell you how many mothers thank me for what I’m doing.”**

**“Doing? So your steering parents to Dr. Setrakian? Okay, we’re going need their names.”** Liv said.

 **“I won’t betray them. The AMA, the CDC, the Board of Health, the department of Education they are the villains here. Go after them.”** Trudy said. 

**“After them? You’re encouraging other parents. You are endangering the health of every child in this city.”** Liv said. 

**“So this is personal? Because your son took ill. You and you are coming after me?”**

**“No, this has nothing to do with Sergeant Benson’s son. You are openly flouting the law. This is reckless endangerment, and we will stop you.”** Raf said. 

As they walked down the street, after leaving Trudy’s house Raf asked, 

“Want to grab dinner to go and go see Noah?” He took her hand, giving it a squeeze.

“Please.” Liv finally smiled at him.

 **“I’m not panicking okay I’m on my way. Thank you.”** Liv said on the phone.

**“Sergeant Benson, I was hoping to find you.”**

**“Ms. Malko, this really isn’t a good time.”**

**“I know this is difficult for you, but your son will get through this. He’ll never get measles again, and he’ll be stronger because his body did it all on it’s own.”** Trudy said. 

**“You really don’t want to get into this with me right now. My son is suffering. They’re upping his antibiotics.”**

**“Overexposure to antibiotics maybe why his immune system is so weak. That’s another thing you should think about.”**

Rafael came over, 

**“Liv, Liv is everything alright?”**

**“No, his fever is spiking and if it doesn’t come down they might have to give him a spinal tap.”** Liv said, getting in the elevator. 

After the verdict, Raf got down to the hospital, stepping onto Noah’s floor as Fin and Nick were leaving. He walked to Noah’s room, seeing Liv he began tapping on the window. Liv saw him, waved him in.

“Hey.” She said as he walked in.

“How is he?” 

“Going home tomorrow.”

Raf walked over to him, then back to her

“You can pick him up, just be careful of the wires.” 

Liv watched him, carefully picking him up. She smiled. After a while Raf convinced Liv to lay with him on the couch, soon they were both asleep. The next morning, their sweet innocent boy went home.


	14. Parents Nightmare

That morning, Liv had to take Noah to daycare because Raf was gone, Lucy had classes and she was the only one left to drop him off. Rafael was going to gone for a few days with some people he went to Harvard with. They had done background checks on the facility and the workers.

**“Welcome, well this must be little man Noah, hi how is everybody today?”**

**“Good, we just woke up.”** Liv said.

**“Okay.”**

**“Big first day. You ready sweetie? Should I...should I stay a while?”** Liv asked, not knowing what to do.

 **“Well you can but we usually, recommend a quick and loving goodbye.”**

**“Okay, okay, okay. So big first day. You’re okay, baby mwah. Love you.”**

**“You know mom,it’s probably harder on the parents than the kids.”**

**“Okay. Alright. Have fun Noah.”**

Noah started crying, as Liv walked toward the door. As she was walking to the precinct Raf texted her, 

How’s Noah?- Raf

Crying as I left, how long until you are home? - Liv

A few days, I miss mi amor and mijo. - Raf

We miss you too. -Liv

**“Okay thanks, yeah you and me both. That was Barba in St. Barths. He says we can charge him with kidnapping, but when it comes to anyone else, Javier’s word is no good on this.”**

**“So I have to leave early today. Hold down the fort.”**

**“On it.”** Sonny said. 

**“Not you, Fin.”** Liv said.

After Liv left, she grabbed Noah from daycare and went home. Raf facetime her and Noah, as they laid in bed.

“Hey Liv.”

“Hi.” Liv said.

Raf could tell she had a rough day. He smiled as she lifted Noah up to see him. 

“Hey buddy.”

“Papi!”

Raf smiled at him.

“How did he do at daycare?” 

“Okay, they said he started playing about twenty minutes after I left.” 

“How did you do?”

“Okay, got the kid from the case settled with his mom, and I went to get this little guy.” 

“Are you being good for mami mijo?”

Noah cuddled his head, closer to Liv’s shoulder.

“He’s been a little fussy, I think he’s missing papi.” 

Raf smiled.

“I’ll be home tomorrow mijo, I promise.” 

Noah smiled at that, and waved at him. 

“I need to get him to sleep.” Liv said.

“You sleeping together?” Raf asked.

“Yeah, the case got to me today, and I don’t have my other man to cuddle with.” 

“I miss mi amor to cuddle with to, goodnight mijo, mi amor love you both.” Raf chuckled. 

“We love you, too.” 

After Noah was asleep Liv laid there wishing Raf was there with her. Raf was doing the same thing.


	15. Surrendering Noah

Miss Jackson had finished her home evaluation.

 **“You need a toddler bed before he climbs out of that crib.”** Miss Jackson said.

 **“Of course. Okay so…”** Liv said.

 **“You’ve passed all your home studies. I’m going to recommend you be approved as an adoptive parent.”** Miss Jackson said.

**“Thank you. Thank you. Okay. Thank you, Miss Jackson.”**

**“Good luck, Miss Benson.”**

**“I’ll confirm with the agency that Noah’s free for adoption, then we initiate proceedings and go before Judge Linden. Noah’s history birth mother deceased, birth father unknown.”**

**“Yeah, about that. There’s something that I should tell you. So we stumbled across Noah’s birth father during an investigation.”**

“ **Johnny Drake aka Johnny D, has run out of delaying tactics. We are proceeding to trial on 17 counts of rape, assault, trafficking, and kidnapping.”** Rafael said.

 **“Nice work taking this from the feds.”** Sonny said.

 **“You’ll need us to testify?”** Nick asked.

 **“I’m assuming that won’t be a problem?”** Fin asked.

 **“Counselor walk you out?”** Liv asked.

 **“Something you need to tell me?”** Raf asked.

**“Just so you know, I’ve decided to name Johnny D as Noah’s birth father on the adoption papers.”**

**“No. We’ve talked about this. You are under no obligation to do that. It’s not material to what he’s being charged with.”** Raf said, frustrated. 

**“This isn’t about the trial. The adoption paperwork lists Noah’s birth father as unknown.”**

**“So what’s the problem?”**

**“Lying doesn’t work out well for me.”** Liv said.

**“Okay. Johnny D, family court separate universes. He’ll never find out.”**

**“Maybe not, but someday Noah might. Or the courts, I don’t want my life with Noah to be built on a lie.”**

**“Don’t do this. Johnny D is a psychopath. Do not open this door.”** Raf begged.

**Later**

**“Absolutely not.”**

**“Will you just let me finish? Johnny D will relinquish all parental rights and waive visitation. Noah won’t ever have to know he existed.”** Raf explained.

**“He doesn’t get to do this…”**

**“As I was trying to say… They’re offered a plea of 3 to 5 years, which I agree is not enough.”** Raf said.

**“Not enough?”**

**“Braun indicates they might accept ten years.”** Raf said.

**“He does not get to plea this down, because I want to make my life less complicated.”**

**“Okay. There's something else you should know. Regardless of whether he is convicted or not, he can still appeal for his parental rights. He could request and has a good shot at getting court-ordered visitation. You could be taking your son to visit Johnny D in State Prison until Noah turns 18.”**

**“Hey Lucy, thank you for staying.”**

**“Oh of course, how’s Nick?”** Lucy asked.

**“He’s out of surgery his mother with him. It could’ve been worse. Hi, my love. You’re still awake.”**

**“He didn’t want to sleep without his mami.”**

**“Mami’s home, mami’s home, mami home.”**

**“Okay sergeant Benson are you willing to raise this child as your lawful child?”** Linden said.

**“Yes.”**

**“This child will inherit from you. He will be treated no differently than a biological child. Do you agree.”**

**“Yes.”**

**“I know it’s been a long year, a hard process. But everything seems to be in order. Congratulations, Olivia.”**

**“Congratulations Liv, you look happy.”** Fin said.

**“I am.”**

**“Amaro coming?”** Raf asked.

**“Yeah. He’s on his way.”**

**“He’s doing better right?”** Carisi asked.

 **“Yeah. He’s you know, only two weeks into PT, so it’s gonna be a long road.”** Liv said.

 **“To family.”** Fin said.

 **“To family.”** Everyone echoed.

After a while everybody started to clear out, Raf cleaned up while Liv played with Noah. When he was about done, he realized there was no sounds coming from the living room. He looked through the opening at the bar to find Liv and Noah asleep on the couch. He threw down the towel, quietly walking over.

“Liv, Liv.” He whispered.

She stirred, looking at him.

“Let me have mijo, you go get a shower.”

Liv nodded, letting Raf take Noah, and went to the bedroom, she saw Noah and Raf laid out on the bed asleep. Liv got in, cuddled up to them, kissing them goodnight.


	16. Institutional Fail

**“Since when does NYPD kick an investigation back to DOI? Who’s this coming from city hall?”** Liv asked Hank and Chief Dodds. 

**“No one likes bad headlines, but let me be clear. I’m not just in charge of press for NYPD. I’m the commissioner’s right hand. I work for him, and so do you.”**

**“I issue the subpoenas. SVU is investigating at my request.”** Raf said. 

**“SVU doesn’t work for you, counselor.”** Hank said. 

**“So that’s it. They just call us off?”**

**“Well they call you off, I don’t work for NYPD.”**

After Jeanette Grayson and Matt Sheridan were found guilty. Rafael went home to relieve Lucy and to finish paperwork. As Liv walked in the door an hour later Raf and Noah was on the couch, Noah half asleep and Raf singing to him. When Raf spotted her, he smiled whispering to Noah,

“Look who’s home mijo.”

Noah slowly turned his head, lighting up when he saw her and reaching for her. Liv set her bag down and put her shield and gun in her safe before going over and sitting beside her two boys. Noah was immediately in her lap, cuddling up.

“Lucy said he was good today.” Raf whispered.

Liv nodded, leaning her head on his shoulder, closing her eyes as he kissed the top of her head. They sat there quietly, Raf with his lips to her head breathing in her scent. Eventually he leaned back and they both sat there looking at Noah.

Noah got fidgety with the quiet staring and ran off to his room. Raf sighed as he watched him go. He turned to Liv and said

“All I could think about all through this was what if that had happened to Noah. If you hadn’t adopted him, he could have been one of the children hurt by the system that was supposed to protect them.”

By the time he finished he was trying hard not to cry. Liv pulled him into her arms saying,

“Noah wasn’t hurt and because of you the system is being overhauled and you’ve saved all those kids who would have been hurt in the future. On behalf of all those children all I can do is say thank you. You are my hero Raf, you went out on a limb and upset City Hall but never forget it was the right thing to do.”

As she finished she realised that Raf was quietly sobbing on her shoulder. He turned to look at her whilst wiping his face and said,

“It wasn’t just me, it was a team effort, without you and the Squad I would never have got the ammunition to get them charged.”

“Okay, I’ll give you that but you’re the one in City Halls sights.” He mmmd in agreement and cuddled even closer to Liv as he got his composure back.

“He’s okay Raf, don’t get upset over what could have been.” 

“I know, but it didn’t help that the kids from the case could have been him.”

“I know, I kept having that same thought as I was reading those files and as you were cross examining Jeanette. But he’s here with two parents who love him along with a squad of uncles and an aunt, and soon to be cousin.” 

They both nodded.

“Liv how about we go to bed and he sleeps in our bed also?” 

Liv smiled at him.

They laid down, Noah between them. 

“Love you, Noah, Rafa.”

“Love you, mi amor, mijo."


	17. Depravity Standard

**“Hold on, Hassler did what? She made me look too conscientious.”** Liv asked.

 **“She implied you were so desperate to get closure for Delores, you manufactured a suspect.”** Raf said.

**“That’s ridiculous and you let her get away with it?”**

**“I couldn’t shoot her. She just doing her job.”**

**“So you let her hang me out to dry.”**

**“Table that. You’re up after lunch. Let’s prep.”** Raf said, frustrated.

**“You know what, I’ve actually testified a few hundred times so I think I’ll be fine. I need to get back to the squad room.”**

**“No, you don’t. Lewis Hodda might walk if Hassler can make the jury think your emotions got in the way of your police work, which is what they’re doing right now. I need you to sit your ass down and work with me.”** Rafael said.

**“Fine start working.”**

**“Some of the jurors would like to uh, light a candle for Hector tonight. Is that okay?”** Mrs. Rodriguez

 **“Of course.”** Raf said.

 **“Okay, and thank you Mr. Barba I...I I know how hard you tried.”** Miss Rodriguez walked away.

After the memorial, and Wyatt and his family now being willing to go to trial, Raf and Liv headed home,

“You’re going to the hospital?”

“Yeah, to check on Rollins, Carisi is still with her.”

Raf nodded.

They got home, Liv ran back to the hospital and came back, as she entered the apartment, it was quiet, so she went into Noah’s room and kissed him goodnight. She moved towards the door, as she got there she turned around for one last look, then leant up against it. She didn’t know how long she was standing there, until she felt Raf’s arms and smelt his cologne.

“Hey mi amor.” He kissed her cheek.

“Hi Rafa.”

Liv leaned into him, bringing her arms up to his where they wrapped around her waist.

“We’re good, right?”

“Yes, always.” Liv turned towards Raf and kissed him.

He smiled as she kissed him.

“Do you want some wine? Or do you want a bath and bed?” Raf asked.

“Meet me in the bathroom, with wine and whatever you want.” Liv whispered.

Raf nodded, gave her one more kiss then went to the kitchen while Liv went to fill the tub. When Raf went to the bathroom, Liv was already in the tub, full with hot water and bubble bath.

“Started without me?” Raf smirked.

“A little, but I don’t feel bad about it.” Liv shrugged.

Raf chuckled as he handed one glass to Liv, setting the other on the sink while he stripped, and settled behind her. Liv moved, getting comfortable with her head on his shoulder, he kissed her forehead, massaging her shoulder and neck with one hand.

“Love you, Liv.”

“Love you too, Raf.”


	18. Townhouse Incident

**“Nice work, where’s Liv?”** Raf asked.

 **“She’s still at the DNA conference.”** Fin said.

 **“No, she’s not, I was there all morning, I would have seen her.”** Raf said.

Sonny was in the break room, seeing Lucy knocking.

 **“Hey detective Carisi.”** Lucy said.

 **“Hey, Lucy. Liv’s not in.”** Sonny said.

**“She’s not? I’m a little worried. This morning I sent her to the brownstone of another family I work for."**

**“I texted her a few hours ago about the push in rapist.”** Mike said.

 **“But you didn’t actually speak to her?”** Raf said.

**“No.”**

**“And now she’s sending us a text about William Lewis?”** Raf said, calling Liv.

 **“That’s got to be a code for 10-13.”** Fin said.

After they took Joe out and it was over.

**“Where’s Noah?”**

**“He’s with Lucy, we’ll get him.”** Tucker said.

“Raf?”

“He’s in the car with Fin.” Mike said.

They both lead her to the car, Raf opened the door, Dodds got Liv in and closed the door. Fin started the sirens, Liv huddled against Raf.

“Rafa?”

“Shh. Fin’s taking us to the hospital to get you checked out, then home to Noah.”

Liv nodded, too exhausted to argue. After getting checked out, Fin drove them both home, walking in Lucy begin to apologize.

“It’s okay Lucy, really. Your instincts were right.”

“Okay, I’m still sorry for dragging you into it. I’ll go.”

Raf got Liv to sit down, Lucy was halfway out when he caught up to her.

“Hey Lucy.”

“I’m sorry Raf, I’ve got to go.”

“Don’t blame yourself, the family is safe and alive because of you.” Raf said.

Lucy smiled.

“Thanks Raf.”

“Your welcome, take the next two days off.” Raf said.

Lucy nodded, Raf went back, seeing Liv was no longer on the couch and the lights were off. Raf moved to Noah’s room. He looked in, not seeing Noah or Liv, he went to their room. He smiled when he saw mother and son asleep already, cuddled together. Raf changed into pajama pants deciding against a shirt and cuddled up against Liv. Liv shifted, along with Noah Raf rubbed her sides, kissing her.

“Love you Liv.”

“Love you Raf.”

“You okay?”

“I am, as long as I got my boys.”

“You will always have us.”

“Are you okay?” Liv asked.

“Not really, I almost had a panic attack when Lucy showed us the text and I heard William Lewis’s name.”

“I knew you and Fin would figure out I needed help.”

“Always.” Raf whispered, holding her closer.


End file.
